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”Your absence: Paradigm shift” (just another blog to blab.) (will update visual support later)Share Friday, June 4, 2010 at 4:54pm | Edit Note | DeleteMy blog


”Your absence: Paradigm shift”
- Chuck sumicad

Dili pud amung patio pero madawat na ni.. bwhaha!!4:20 am / May 28, 2010
Patio, Bahay @ DIgos City


Synopsis: Staring on the monitor is one heck of a problem, Been thinking of things to put up. Just woke up. Yawning, I thought “Ano gawin ko?! Bakit ko na on ang laptop? , May be may maisip ako na i-write pag I turn-on ko ang Laptop”. It was about 2:00 am since I woke up yet several hours have passed and nothing came. Non, till the clock chimed at about 4:20 am. Then I had a sudden rush of Ideas. Authors were true about sudden ideas came popping like mushrooms under dead trees. It was an amazing feeling. Thoughts like “Yes.. I would be able to entice people to read my piece again”, “Expression through letters is so amazing” and “Sharing to people the thought is my head cures the silence that resides in my heart.” The blabber was written first before my synopsis but it was worth it since I was able to write precisely on whatever comes in my mind. It was jumbled, muddled and mixed up. But eventually it cleared a path for me to be able to write properly. 

Thus, my hands starts to type as fast as it can like a fiddler catching moonlight drops in the story called “The Voyeurs wish” by Alisha Kerston where my hands was typing very fast filled with enthusiasm as its ammunition. It is really cold outside but this feeling accompanied with the calmness of the surrounding can definitely set my thoughts freely. So, here is go…



The Blabber:
Listening to the whispers of the wind, the sound of distant vehicle, the cockling of the rooster at the neighbours backyard and the resonance of my soul is a soothing hum that reverberate throughout my body.

Thus, it allows me to reflect of things outside of the box. ( Oo, May thinking Box ako.. ahha.. at oo, Kasya naman ako.) D, biro lang. I may be laughing and smiling right now but deep inside I have my own paradigm. This thing that I call a “paradigm” is synonymous to the word insights and Ideas 

(try niyo pa i-right click ang word na paradigm in Microsoft word then search its synonyms, there…). Commonly people need this to set a goal, for us to be able to think of ways on how we can survive each and every day of our life without experiencing any discomfort or any deviation from what we want. It is also the perfect catalyst for us to be able to reach a certain point in our life where we could decide for ourselves and where we can set something very important for us to achieve.

I think unconsciously all of us do this paradigm shifting from time to time. Sometimes I think that all of us have these checkpoints that we have to complete for us to reach those goals but just like normal checkpoints it is either totally blocked or we are not allowed to traverse we tend to choose different route instead. No matter how unbearable the route is there are two choices to choose from: either we keep on moving or we could just give up, again. If ever we choose to give up. That doesn’t mean that we can totally give up. We could make our own path by just deciding which is which.

What am I thinking right now? I’m experiencing a total paradigm shift because of you. Yes! Bingo! It is you again. It has always been you. You. You. You. I don’t know why some of my paradigms are shifted to you. I tried to leave you. I tried to forget you. But I can’t. I just can’t. We are supposed to grasp on something for us to be able to keep on holding on. In my state, I’m not holding anything anymore not even a little strand of rope for me to clutch or even tie to you. I want to be honest to you that ever since I saw you everything changed my ideals, my thoughts and my set goals. Now?! You were included in my list. You changed my paradigm. It would be very difficult for me to change it back again. I was thinking about you.

Every time I watched the night sky, It was you who I would remember since I shared a lot of things with you while watching these exuberant sky. On how I shared to you that you were like the sky, that I was not the only one looking at the night sky but also there are billions of people watching and smiling at you even people who are closer to you than the distance between us two. There was also the time where we walked on the same path and I loved the way you look at the sky with those expressions you carried. You never fail to amuse me. All of those things, to be changed abruptly?! I just can’t live with that. I know you did not ask for me to include you on the list. But, I loved you. If this was an Infatuation it would be way over back then. Still, what can I do?!


I was never given the chance to love you. You did not accept me. And here comes your absence. Days, Weeks has started to grow. I can’t see you. Where are you? It’s not that I’m looking for you. It is just that I would like to introduce Mr. sensitive. Day in and day out still no sign of you but alas! I saw you shout from a distance through that annoying silence. Not really getting what you are screaming still I’m here and I would like to scream your name just so you can hear me and notice my existence. Yet, I did not. 
I held back and clutching my hands as if harbouring some strength to ask someone for my first date in a huge prom night I turned around. Not looking at the person I care and love so much. I started to walk my own path. Not looking back and will be accepting my new paradigm. 

A paradigm without you in it…